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Father’s Day Emotions From a Single Mom

Guest Post By: Laura S. 
Image Source: Father's Day Mom Quotes

Image Source: Father’s Day Mom Quotes

I knew holidays would be some of the most difficult days post-divorce.  What I wasn’t prepared for, was how upsetting Father’s Day could be.  Year after year this day approaches and with it comes emotions that are typically (and thankfully) very uncommon for me.

Anger

I have found myself on the days leading up to Fathers Day genuinely angry.  Years have gone by but I can still get angry, mostly with myself and my ex-husband for not being able to make it work.   It’s a day that reminds me that my kids don’t have their dad in their life like I “planned” and that makes me mad.

 

Resentment

I parent, unassisted, 98% of the time.  My ex is “around” but not “involved”.   I resent not only him as you might expect but many of the good things, the privileges that I have worked so hard for.  Because of these privileges we have days and weeks that are so full of life and activity that it’s almost impossible to do it alone – yet I do and I do it sometimes at the expense of quality time with my kids and time for myself.  

Jealousy

I am a realist; I know the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence.  I also try to teach my children about all that they have to be grateful for.  But Father’s day is one of those days where I have been genuinely jealous of family and friends as they celebrate together.  I think this is mostly because Father’s Day celebrates all the
“traditional” qualities of dads – and those are the things I know my kids miss out on each day.

I acknowledge that this this is a little negative.  But I’m sharing it because I know I can’t be the only woman who feels this way.  There are so many Mom’s who feel like they are playing both roles which I know from experience can lead to all these emotions.  

So, this year I am vowing to break the pattern and I hope others who may feel the same way will be empowered to do as well.  I will not wake up on Sunday and entertain a single one of those emotions for even a second.  Instead, I will sincerely say ‘Thank you’ to my children’s father.  He may not be perfect, the relationship he has with them may not be perfect but it’s because of him that I have beautiful little people in my life who make every single day a day to be celebrated.    There’s too much good for all the negativity.  

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